Use the Haters to Elevate You

It was revealed to me recently that a member of my community was an absolute hater who remained just to constantly add negativity into whatever I was going through.  Whether it was my recent relapse with gaming or something else, the comments this individual made was constantly trying to be a dick and not providing any value whatsoever.  I banned this individual, but at the end of the day, his jealousy can be a thing that I can use against haters such as this.  I may be a has been in streaming, but this individual was a never was.  That is why this animosity existed, pure and simple, but what he doesn't realize is that what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger, and I appreciate the motivation his departing words gave me.

What streaming has made me realize is that people who say they are your friends, really may not be.  Throughout the 10 plus years of doing this profession, I have had to ban numerous people throughout the years, many of which were warranted, and some of which perhaps were not.  I make amends with those I ban at times if they are amendable, but many remained banned forever.  This is important because ultimately, some people will never change, especially this individual who I had to ban today.  While many people warned me about him, had confrontations about him even, I stood up for him saying he was my boy.  Some prominent figures I use to game with told me he was bad news, yet I still stuck with him and stood up for him, only to be constantly bombarded with negativity.  Moving forward, I am going to take the advice from people more readily when a troublemaker enters my atmosphere, because ultimately, it's not worth the headache with these people. 

What I will do instead however, is use this as a fresh start of sorts, to work harder towards what I want instead of focusing on time wasters, both people and activities in my life that have started to become burdensome.  My first move was to remove playing a weekly Dungeons and Dragons campaign that we are 4 sessions into.  This makes me sad on one hand, because I did enjoy it, but on the other, it did provide a bit of a stress to me in order to have to block out 3 hours of time at a late hour when I usually go to bed early.  The other time wasters are the daily activity of going to the cafe and writing / reading.  I can use this blog to write, and I can read while at home if I choose, but ultimately, spending 2 to 3 hours every morning in a cafe is a bit of a waste of time.  Instead, I will still continue my daily walks, go the gym right afterwards, then do my 2nd walk of the day and call it a day.

When these activities are completed, I can then put my energy back into my stream and stream for longer hours and begin to do some research to buy an upgraded rig.  I may also buy a laptop along with it so that I can have a computer for work related tasks (when I do get a job that is).  When I say put more hours into streaming, it means that I need to go all in on it again so that I no longer feel guilty doing it.  There was a time in my streaming career when streaming was all I cared about and while that was unhealthy without my daily walks and gym time, it was where I was starting to get motion in streaming and made a career out of it.  I need to tap into that version of me once again if I want to make this a success again.  There are many people who are haters as mentioned above, but it is never too late to resurrect this side of me if I can be disciplined in the other areas of my life.

With that said, enough fluff.  Time to get back on the walking path, go to the gym, and then stop to get some food for the long day of streaming and gaming ahead.  Again, while I am disappointed in the person who pretended to be my friend over the years, I appreciate the added motivation that I have this morning to actually go ahead and hit the ground running after a couple of days of feeling low.  Time to get to it.

Until next time,

Blackboa