My Twitch Streams Future is Uncertain

I have been a streamer on Twitch now for many years, since November 2016 in fact.  I have loved moments of it, and I have hated moments of it, but I carried on through the good and the bad.  As of late, I am back on a downward spiral with it because I have rightfully prioritized my time towards my health and fitness and I plan on continuing to do so.  I think the reason why I am feeling a downward trajectory in my twitch is that I am still uncertain about the game I should be putting my attention to.  I have committed to playing Elder Scrolls Online in a pretty big way by purchasing a year's worth of premium, but I already am seeing myself playing it less and less.  How can I get myself back on the track of motivated gaming while still prioritizing my health and fitness above all else?

What I need to do is really think about my role in gaming.  I need to think what I enjoy doing the most and ultimately enjoy playing the most that provides me with the least amount of stress and the maximum amount of enjoyment.  The biggest thing I see is the social side of MMORPG's and the social side that my stream brings to this part of gaming as well.  I love being able to talk to chat endlessly about things, but when my chat is dead, I really feel like streaming is a dead end.  Elder Scrolls Online unfortunately makes my chat pretty much dead.  No one has anything to say, my viewer count is in the dumpster, and ultimately, no one really cares about that game from my core community except maybe a couple of people who don't talk much anyways (not that I don't appreciate them, but they aren't that chatty so my feelings of it not being worth it just continue to be had).

The only game at present that would give me the chat interaction that I want, or at least a higher chat interaction, would be Albion Online, the first game I ever played and the game that I ultimately started my Twitch career in.  While that game gives me what I want on the streaming side more than Elder Scrolls Online, it doesn't really do it for me much anymore on the gameplay side.  It can last for a week or two maybe, but then I end up getting bored just like I did with Elder Scrolls Online.  I am in a tough position now where the games I should be playing are the games that I do not enjoy as much anymore.  This is why I, and others, keep searching for any new game that comes out in the hopes that it might actually be fun.  The unfortunate reality though is that all MMORPGs suck right now, and honestly, I think you can extrapolate that across the board to all of gaming sucks right now.

While this gaming drought is happening however, I have received some more good news on my health and fitness front.  Since stopping energy drink and soda consumption, walking daily and going to the gym, and eating healthier, I have noticed a drastic decrease in my blood pressure.  I also went to my neurology appointment yesterday and was told by a neurosurgeon that my benign meningioma tumors in my brain really are nothing to worry about and that I no longer had to get an MRI scan every 5 years unless I had symptoms that something was wrong.  At the end of the day, the best and most important MMORPG I am currently doing the best in is the MMORPG of life, especially when it comes to the health and fitness side of the equation.  This is more important to me than any amount of gaming, and while I hope I can find more enjoyment in gaming in the near future, I also am grateful my health continues to improve, and my setbacks are much smaller in my journey to become the ultimate version of myself.

Until next time,

Blackboa